Jessica Logan: Inner beauty and strength
18 November, 2024
TW: Suicidal Thoughts
If you’ve read previous articles about Jessica (see issues 53 & 61 of Tidings), I’m sure you’ve been moved by her strength, resilience, and commitment to raising awareness for hidden disabilities. Anyone who has endured surgery, lived with a colostomy bag, or battled chronic fatigue, will know just how much she’s had to dig deep and push through to accomplish what she has. It is not just her triumphs that inspire but her candidness about the ongoing struggles she faces. Her journey in pageantry, advocacy, and personal battles shows someone who is realistic about her challenges but is not defined by them.
From Adversity to Advocacy
Jessica’s life took an unexpected turn in 2017 following emergency surgery that resulted in her living with a stoma. This drastic change came with a myriad of physical and mental health challenges. “I was worried how I’d live a normal life after stoma surgery. I have suffered with body dysmorphia all my life and it was a shock to adapt to an ostomy bag,” she recalls. The initial sight of her stoma was overwhelming, and the fear of how others, including her fiancé, would perceive her was a constant worry.
Despite these fears, Jessica found the strength to transform her pain into a platform for advocacy. Participating in pageants became a crucial part of this transformation. Winning titles like the Diamond UK Ambassador in 2022 and competing internationally have given her a stage to not only showcase her resilience but also raise awareness for invisible illnesses and disabilities.
“During interviews, I always ensure I talk about the work I do to create change for those like myself, living with an invisible illness and disability,”
Jessica explains.
In many pageants, especially those that celebrate difference, the traditional swimwear competition is optional. I know I would shy away from showing my body full of scars or with a colostomy bag, but Jessica did not. She took to the stage in the swimsuit competition with a colostomy bag on (even though she had already had her reversal), her scars on show and a sign that said “All bodies should be celebrated”. This is a powerful testament to her message that representation matters.
JESSICA AT THE 2022 DIAMOND UK PAGEANT, THE FIRST TIME SHE USED THE SWIMSUIT CATEGORY TO RAISE AWARENESS AROUND INVISIBILE ILLNESS AND BODY POSITIVITY.
Success Stories and Impact
Jessica’s impact through pageantry and advocacy is impressive. Winning the BBC Make a Difference Together Award in September and coming in the top eight for the ITV National Diversity Awards for Positive Role Model Disability in 2022 are just a few of her accolades. She’s also been a finalist and Diamond Pageant UK Title holder every year since 2021.
But perhaps more significant are the personal connections she has made along the way. “After my 2022 swimwear performance at the Diamond UK Pageant where I used a stoma bag and sign, I was approached by someone to say thank you for the representation because their husband lived with one,” she shares. Such moments underscore the importance of visibility and advocacy in changing perceptions and providing support.
This year at Diamond Internationals, Jessica entered and won all three optional categories: National Wear (she designed a fun Eurovision costume), Swimwear and Spokesmodel. It’s her dream to win an international pageant title one year and I’m sure you’d agree she is well on her way to make this happen.
Not satisfied with only competing in other pageants, Jessica founded her own: The Warrior Charity Pageant. Karen, a bowel cancer survivor, publicly displayed her stoma bag for the first time at Jessica’s pageant, a moment that filled Jessica with immense pride. These stories highlight not only Jessica’s achievements but also the ripple effect of her work in empowering others to embrace their own journeys
An Ongoing Battle with Mental Health
While Jessica’s story is one of triumph, it is also marked by the ongoing battle with mental health. “I still fight against body dysmorphia but I’m proud of my scars and what they represent,” she admits. Her scars, once a source of distress, have become symbols of her strength and resilience. However, the road to this acceptance has been fraught with challenges. Suicidal thoughts plagued her early days post-surgery, but with the support of her husband, counselling, and antidepressants, she found a way forward. “Finding people in support groups to connect with really helped me feel understood and like I wasn’t alone on my journey,” Jessica reflects.
Despite these supports, Jessica still faces significant mental health challenges. “I fight daily with my mental thoughts telling me that I am a burden on those around me and that I am a failure because of what I’ve lost since becoming chronically ill,” she confides. The loss of career-driven independence and the dream of having children are constant sources of grief. Chronic fatigue syndrome further compounds these struggles, often leaving her feeling like a prisoner in her own home
Balancing Positivity and Realism
Jessica’s narrative is not one of toxic positivity but of realistic perseverance. She is open about her bad days, where motivation is hard to find, and small tasks feel monumental. “I have lots of overwhelming emotions and have to hide away from everything until I’ve cooled down,” she says. Yet, she also celebrates small victories, understanding the importance of acknowledging every achievement, no matter how minor.
Her daily routines are flexible, adapting to her fluctuating energy levels. “There are days I have to decide not to shower as it takes too much energy and days I have to stay in bed,” Jessica explains. Support from her husband and parents is crucial, as is limiting activities like food shopping or long drives without company. These adjustments are necessary to navigate the complexities of her health
Pageantry: A Platform for Change
Participating in pageants has been a transformative experience for Jessica. It has provided her with a purpose and a supportive community. “Throughout my life, I had never felt accepted as my true self until pageants,” she reveals. The diverse and inclusive nature of modern pageantry has allowed her to showcase her scars and advocate for invisible illnesses on a global stage.
Many people still assume that pageants are outdated events focused solely on judging women based on their looks. However, Jessica’s success in the pageantry world challenges these misconceptions and outdated beauty standards. She emphasizes that “a small part of pageants is the time on stage… judges aren’t scoring you on your physique or beauty. They’re looking for individuals who feel comfortable in their own skin and can project that confidence on stage.” The emphasis in modern pageantry is on confidence, character, and dedication to meaningful causes.
JESSICA CONTINUING HER ADVOCACY AT THIS YEAR’S INTERNATIONAL DIAMOND PAGEANT
PHOTO CREDIT: Ant Bradshaw at Style and Story International Photography
Looking Ahead
Jessica’s future is bright with aspirations. She continues to run her yearly Warrior Charity Pageant for those with invisible illnesses and disabilities. This year it will be held in Staffordshire on 30 November 2024. For tickets and donations, please follow this link: https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/whats-on/burntwood/burntwood-memorial-institute/warrior-charity-pageant-2024/e-eyavpa
All money raised is split between 10 charities that support people with invisible illnesses and disabilities. Even if you can’t attend, you can still support this worthy cause.
“Support and awareness can help us feel like the true warriors we are, valued by society instead of a burden or a failure.”
Her message to those facing similar challenges is clear: “You are not alone and it’s OK to ask for support. There are people in our community that will understand your journey, and connecting with them can be a huge help.” This sense of community and shared experience is what Jessica hopes to foster through her advocacy and thinks pageants are a great way to do this. There are many pageants that celebrate difference around the UK and if you’re interested in participating, you can do research them following the links below to find the right fit for you.
Jessica Logan’s journey is a testament to the power of resilience and the importance of realistic narratives in advocacy. Her story, marked by personal struggles and significant achievements, serves as an inspiration to many. It is a reminder that while our traumas do not define us, our responses to them can shape our paths. Jessica’s mission to turn her pain into power continues to make a difference, showing that true strength lies in the courage to be vulnerable and the determination to advocate for change. We can’t wait to see what she does next!
LINKS
For more information on this year’s Warrior Charity Pageant:
https://www.facebook.com/share/SFgHvVa3G6Y6tBJ2/
For more information about Diamond UK pageants:
https://missdiamonduk.com/
